Today's been an interesting day. When I figured I'd skip last night, I didn't think of the implications. In other words, I fogot that whenever I skip I get this weird icky feeling that I'm a horrible person adn I've done something wrong or that I've missed out on something. And it didn't help much that I didn't feel all that much better for the extra sleep I got.
So, so far today - all 5 hours that I've been awake for - have been pretty crappy. I went and made-up an Econ test in Modern Problems that I missed, oh, about two months ago, so you can imagine the score that I'll get on that. It shouldn't be that bad though, because I only need a few points of it to raise my grade.
Oh, and funny story. After Calculus I realize that I haven't seen my key for a long time. So I look through my pockets, through the hoodie I'd worn to school, on the bottom of the locker, on the ground around me. Nope, no key tied to a bright yellow key chain. So I look in the Calculus room, the bio room, in the library, in the hallways. Nope. I ask Mr. Wright if any one had seen it. Nope. I ask the office if anyone had turned it in. Nope. So I resign myself to walking home with my ginormously huge backpack that is carrying everything I use at school (two text books, five notebooks, other miscellaneous garbage) to get my other key and drop off my stuff, then go back to the school and get my car. But then, lo and behold, I'm out by the tennis courts, and I realize I never took my key out of my car. All that stress and freaking out over nothing.
That's sort of the story of my life though.
Random fact: Did you know I still confuse my y's and my u's? It's going to suck if I go to BYU-I. I'll end up writing it BUY-I, because I'm a loser like that.
Speaking of college. Wow. I think it barely hit me today that it's really ending. College is beginning and High School, and everything that is familiar about it, is ending. I've got mixed feelings about it. I'm looking back over the past few years - this past year especially - and am wishing I'd done a lot of things or that I hadn't done other things. Everything since the end of the musical has gone by so quickly. Even before that things seemed to be zipping by. I've missed friends that I haven't hung out with for a while and ones that I've sort of let slip away. And of course, those that I've under-appreciated. There are only two weeks left. It just feels strange that it's really ending. Normally, when the school year ended you'd have next year to look forward to seeing the people you missed during the summer. Now that won't happen. It's a disconcerting realization. I still don't know if I'm going to go to the all-night party though. I probably won't go on the Senior trip, instead I'll might spend the day hanging out with Mollie and Beckah and Katelyn, because they're not going either. Now, because that last paragraph seemed a bit heavy, I'll make a list:
Things that make Jillian insanely happy:
1) Hanging out with friends
2) Looking at pictures of friends
3) Remembering good times with friends
4) Not worrying about having to do something
5) Taking leisurely walks with friends
6) Night time
7) Looking at the clear night sky on my roof...alone, but especially with friends
8) Good choral music...especially Eric Whitacre, and especially Sleep, which I am currently listening to
9) Laughing at something good and clean, usually stupid jokes deriving from candy wrappers or other random things
10) Knowing you're doing something right
11) Watching the sun rise
12) Seeing happy people
13) Good hugs
14) Chocolate
15) Knowing that you're loved
16) Seeing the people you care about succeed
17) Good talks with friends...or strangers...or family...really, good talks with anybody
18) Reading my scriptures
19) Knowing that no matter how many people dislike you and are rooting for you to fail, there's always at least one person that wants me to succeed and overcome all
20) Knowing that Heavenly Father and Christ love you and that they're there to help you if you'll only let them (refer to #19)
So that's my top 20 list right now, in no particular order as numbers 20, 19, & 18 are a bit more important than chocolate.
*sigh* I feel much better now. Time to go tackle some homework. I love you all! If I become overly sentimental the next few weeks, just humor me. Hope you're all having an awesome week.
Toodles!
-Jillian
p.s. JENNIFER COMES HOME IN 29 DAYS!!!!!
1 comment:
hey pill,
I'm going to be sentimental too...and yeah for LISTS! only cool people like us make lists. and i agree to like, all of your things, especially the ones that have "...with friends" on the end of them. cuz its so true. love you.
~ms. pants
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